Friday, December 30, 2016



when i was 47- 48kg (with no diet- i just had less appetite due to packed schedule, adjusting and balancing between work and studies).

that time, mak and basu were kinda worried coz according to them, i looked cengkung (my face and my arms).

and then in nov 2014, we went to grand lexis PD for a week. I love all those western breakfast and pastries that i gained a kilo for a week. that makes me 48-49kg.

and in nov-dec 2015, i went for SPM marking. I marked 300++ scripts and those made me stressed (though i gained lots of experience and knowledge). So during this stressful period, I cooked, baked and ate a lot of cheesy and sweet food. Those pizza, pastas, cakes, etc were mostly craved and for comfort eating. my weight hiked up to 52kg.
ok... now it had reached 50s!

and towards the end of 2016, i noticed my increasing appetite, bigger portion of food (rice, etc) and craves for food becoming more frequent. i also noticed that my baju kurung and other clothes were not that 'loose' anymore. of course i could see my cheeks are chubbier and other parts are getting 'chubby' too. so the first person who made it clear to me that im getting 'bigger' is bame, then my students, then my SILS, bani, then my colleagues. and of course la mak abah n basu dont mind and love seeing me eating more and gaining more kgs.

i dont mind people making fuss bout my weight or saying that im 'berisi'- coz i do agree with them. lol.
the thing is, im not comfortable with chubbier cheeks and other bulging parts. im not overweight as according to BMI- im still in ideal weight but i dont feel quite comfortable.

so i guess 2017, i shall be back to less than 50kgs? ahahahaa. ive never done any kind of diet before. it is all based on my appetite. but yeah, must eat healthily la kannn..

and please, jgnlah goda me with food. i tak kuaddd..ahahaa choi!

ps. kurus, slim, berisi, gemuk, tembam etc are all very subjective. some would say 55kg isnt heavy and some would say otherwise. So yeah :)

Thursday, December 29, 2016

"Sekiranya hajat kita yang dipaut melalui doa tidak dimakbulkan, ianya antara dua; Sama ada kerana hati yang berhajat itu masih berlumut dengan maksiat, ataupun aturan Allah untuk tidak memakbulkannya adalah lebih baik buat kita."

Kredit : QuranicGen


Monday, December 19, 2016

Acapkali yang paling kita sakit
Dan yang paling kerap kita sakiti
Adalah yg paling banyak cinta kita padanya.

Saturday, December 17, 2016



Hilang kata, bicara dan gaya
untuk persembahkan 1001 kata
walau hakikatnya pelbagai medium sedia tertadah
untuk meluah dan mengungkap hari tujuhbelasduabelas.
setiap itu
hanya mampu ukir dengan doa dan fatihah
moga sentiasa dalam rahmat Ilahi.
hadiah di setiap kali tujuhbelasduabelas.

Monday, September 19, 2016


stay positive sara.

be kind inside out.
smile and dont lose hope. HE is there.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Setiap kali birthday
Setiap kali merdeka
Setiap kali hari malaysia
Setiap kali itu jugalah ia remuk semula.
Dan lebih parah bila ia bukan sahaja di hari yang dinyata sahaja.

Monday, August 29, 2016

I could sense that my time with my parents especially my mom is getting shorter and shorter.

I miss her and i would easily cry when i think of her. Sometimes when she sleeps, i gaze at her. Sometimes when she's standing in the kitchen, cutting the vegetables, i would sneak a look at her. Sometimes when she eats, i would sit and admire her face, and herself, enjoying simple dishes on plate. I noticed her tired body and decreasing energy. The woman who gv birth to me and raise me up and still care for me. I feel so bad for not helping her out much.

O Allah, how much time do i hv in this world?
I plea to You dear Lord..not to end mine nor her(and father) until i could repay their kindness, loves, cares and endless sacrifices to the point that they could feel comfort and grateful to You for having a daughter like me. And to the point that they could be one of the reasons for me to be able to get into Your jannah with them.


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